Ravings and Rantings

Welcome to my cloud! It's got a nice silver lining somewhere.....Some ranting, some raving--mostly positive stuff,lots of jokes (I can't stay serious). Nothing going on here that a pina colada or mohito can't fix.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Stillwater Morning

Hey world! Thank you all for your kind comments and welcome home.

Am waking up to how things went wrong at work. Remembered an old word.

Co-dependent.

Oh yah, that one.

Can't blame M entirely for not doing his job, although he didn't. It isn't that black and white. Am glad (sorta) that I got verbally b*tch-slapped by M's boss, it's about the only thing that would have woken me up and gotten things back on the rails. Heaven knows M wouldn't/couldn't have done that.

Back at the old job, M said that he loves/loved me. I know he did, and it was mutual. It started off on his part, I think, as a mind f*ck and wound up somewhere else. We're waaaay too much alike, 'separated at birth' as he put it. And on and on goes the psychodrama as his current boss put it went--(high turnover, high pressure, blah blah blah) and presto, a very highly co-dependent relationship was born with both of us defending/supporting the other. Mind you, it isn't like we both weren't being constantly unfairly attacked by Mr. B. But that's in the past.

The same pattern started emerging over here at the new job. Not that the current boss is anything like Mr. B, far from it. The conditions are light years better. Yet the closeness between Bridg and M led M to start getting sloppy. Spend weeks on what should have taken at most an hour to do. Worked on a hobby at the ofice because Bridg did his job (a big no no on her part). The kids saw it, so did everyone else. I said zip about it but it was f*cking obvious anyway. And the more it went on (i.e. the more I enabled him) the lazier and the more brazen he got. The bolder and the more arrogant he got with his own boss, until the man finally stood up and said ENOUGH to the one person who he knew would fix it.

Me.

And he did it in a way he knew would get action fast.

OK OK OK I get it, I fixed it, we're back on track.

And we are too. The boss dropped by at the end of the day just as we were discussing a key issue that needed his input. He was delighted, sat down, listened to our (my) idea, agreed with the approach, and off we went. He mentioned/gave direction to M on other stuff, it was fabulous. And for once, M acted like a manager and employee. About f*cking time. This is a VERY important man that M has been treating like a clerk. I can't believe we aren't fired. And grateful. It's a measure of how good this man is that we aren't (yet).

I have stopped buying him (M) coffee, didn't eat lunch with him today..no socializing AT ALL(well very little, none that didn't involve work). This is a bit like separating two souls at the roots because we are so damn much alike and have worked side by side for years, but I don't care. The boundaries went up overnight and if I have to break both our butts to get him to behave and do his job so be it. I don't love him like that, he's got a job to do, so do I and I would no more hurt this office and the people in it than I would set my own house on fire.

He was behaving like a spoiled little kid and I enabled him.

Shame on me but it's fixed.

Most of you are wondering about the quick change in topic from GI to M? Don't be. M and GI are so unrelated. M, much as I care about him, and much as it pains me to write this, is highly intelligent and gorgeous. Women everywhere give him the eye. Think Richard Gere. Extremely smart. Manipulative. Womanizer. (sort-of) Married. Great sense of humor. Anything but innocent. On the selfish/self-centred side (I hate typing that). Have known him for a few years (2-3). His wife is a lovely and long suffering person. I like her very much.

GI I met in high school. Also intelligent and gorgeous in a Colin Firth way. Innocent as the day he was born. Sweet. If he's dated more than 10 women in his life I'd be astonished. VERY married. Great sense of humor (much like M's). Not in the least bit manipulative. The soul of integrity and honour. As is his wife. She is beautiful right down to her bones, funny--she makes me shake my head she is just so beautiful. They work together and I just love her and them. Know what I mean? It almost makes you cry they are so good. I wish that they'd had kids, they are the type of people that the world needs more of (OK I know that this grammar is bad). The last person in the world that he thinks of is himself. This might sound stupid and impulsive but if I had to give up my life for someone not related to me it would be these two without a second thought. It isn't just him, it's them.

Does this make sense? I wish I could introduce them to you. Hope this helps, world. This type of person/people is so rare. I'm glad they exist and have stumbled into others like them, but they are definitely at the far end of 'fine'. Think that the kids that I have the honour of working with will mature/grow into similar people. Sure hope so. Anything I can do to help them that way, I will.

Wonder if I'd had kids of my own if I'd be this kind of nurturing? Hmmm

Hoping I haven't bored you all to tears.....

Bridg

p.s. You know I love you guys, right?

p.s.p.s. The Most Spoiled Cat In The Universe is home. Her teeth are clean and one was pulled. YAY!!!!! Nagging (and eating) to begin tomorrow, we are sleeping off the anaesthetic right now. Thanks for all your prayers/good wishes, I know they helped. No word on Sis yet, I think she goes in for 'sentinal node' testing in 2-3 weeks. There is only one surgeon in Ottawa who does this stuff.

7 Comments:

  • At 5/12/2006 10:53:00 PM, Blogger Peter said…

    Hi Bridg, you have no idea how good retirement feels when I read about all the crap that's still going on out there in the workplace.
    Glad to hear things are sorted, FOR NOW.

     
  • At 5/12/2006 11:42:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Peter, would sell...well maybe not soul but a heck of a lot of things to be in your shoes.

    Heck, I'd sell them just to visit your neck of the woods.


    Jan 4, 2011 here I come....

    and you're right, it's a big for now...

    Bridg

     
  • At 5/13/2006 11:00:00 AM, Blogger tshsmom said…

    I've asked my vet to do MY dental work. He's a heckuva lot cheaper than my dentist!!
    I'm also sick of covering everybody else's asses at work.

     
  • At 5/13/2006 01:59:00 PM, Blogger DrinkJack said…

    Bridg - I step away for a few days and come back to chaos seen, solved, and moved beyond. So glad it is working out and that you have the intelligence to work through the web of life. Hope you are having a brilliant time with GI.

     
  • At 5/13/2006 03:04:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Thanks DMJ, glad that you caught me now, not in the middle of all this crap. I'm a bit slow on the uptake but I get there.

    Am waiting for GI to arrive. In some ways this is better than being 18, in others, not! At least don't have to worry about future dates, pimples etc and he's (thank heavens) safely married and accounted for. That takes a big load off. Anticipation of a dear darling pal on the other hand....not sure it's much different from being a kid.

    Hey will start visiting you guys and getting back up to speed soon. Have not even read a newspaper for 2-3 weeks.

    Love and hugs, Bridg

     
  • At 5/13/2006 03:55:00 PM, Blogger tshsmom said…

    Not reading the paper can be a GOOD thing. Way less stress that way. God knows you don't need any more stress!!
    Relax and enjoy your visit. You deserve some fun!

     
  • At 5/14/2006 11:08:00 AM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Thanks tshsmom. He's getting ready to leave now (11:06). Lovely visit. Can't wait till next weekend when Dar comes too.

    I.am.spoiled.

    Loving every second of it.

    This WORK stuff that gets in the way tho.....

     

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