Ravings and Rantings

Welcome to my cloud! It's got a nice silver lining somewhere.....Some ranting, some raving--mostly positive stuff,lots of jokes (I can't stay serious). Nothing going on here that a pina colada or mohito can't fix.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Tee Hee Hee!!!

Don't know about YOU world, but I need a giggle or two. Thanks for this one, Adrian!!

Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart ass student turned in the following book report,with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report:

>> Titanic: $29.99
> Clinton: $29.99

>> Titanic: Over 3 hours to read
> Clinton: Over 3 hours to read

>> Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
> Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

>> Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
> Clinton: Bill is a bullsh*t artist.

>> Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
> Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

>> Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
> Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

>> Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
> Clinton: Let's not go there.

>> Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
> Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

>> Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
> Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

>> Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
> Clinton: Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.

>> Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
> Clinton: Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.

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