Ravings and Rantings

Welcome to my cloud! It's got a nice silver lining somewhere.....Some ranting, some raving--mostly positive stuff,lots of jokes (I can't stay serious). Nothing going on here that a pina colada or mohito can't fix.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Comeback of The Year

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman.

He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman's credibility.

Q: "Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?" A: "No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away."

Q: "Officer -- who provided this description?" A: "The officer who responded to the scene."

Q: "A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?" A: "Yes, sir. With my life."

Q: "With your life? Let me ask you this then, officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?" A: "Yes sir, we do."

Q: "And do you have a locker in the room?" A: "Yes sir, I do."

Q: "And do you have a lock on your locker?" A: "Yes sir."

Q: "Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?" A: "You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room."

The courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year's "Best Comeback" line -- and we think he'll win.


  • At 12/16/2005 10:30:00 PM, Blogger jipzeecab said…

    Still LOL...
    Ah..rule number 1 of interrogation. Never ask a question to a witness in open Court you don't already know what the answer is going to be..

  • At 12/16/2005 10:33:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Cool rule, jipzee! Gotta remember that at work too....Bridg

  • At 12/17/2005 08:37:00 AM, Blogger tshsmom said…

    This reminds me of a trial we had in our little town.
    A man was on trial for numerous burglaries. One of the victims was on the witness stand, identifying items that had been stolen from his home.
    When asked if there was anything else he recognized, he pointed at the defendant and said: "Yeah, those are MY work boots he's wearing!"
    Sure enough, the victims name was written inside the boots.
    I have a feeling that the defendant's lawyer checked out his client's attire in the future. ;)

  • At 12/17/2005 09:05:00 AM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Tshsmom, how dumb can you get?? The criminal was wearing the 'booty'!!!

    sorry, haven't had my coffee yet...

  • At 12/17/2005 10:57:00 AM, Blogger tshsmom said…

    LMAO on your play on words!! Why didn't I think of that?

  • At 12/17/2005 03:24:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    think being sleepy and shameless helped, tshsmom!!


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