Ravings and Rantings

Welcome to my cloud! It's got a nice silver lining somewhere.....Some ranting, some raving--mostly positive stuff,lots of jokes (I can't stay serious). Nothing going on here that a pina colada or mohito can't fix.

Monday, June 13, 2005

The Mentos Theme

Can't get that jingle out of my mind. Hi world, how goes it?

Well, I have never been more scared of anything in my life. And it went OK..actually pretty well. Was so relieved that I came home and crashed. Just woke up.

Had two meetings with Mr. B. Both lasted half an hour. The first one in the morning was kinda grumpy, and he said some things about work (mine) (and negative) that I did not agree with at all, but I let it go. Let all of it go, let him talk.

He had to go to a meeting, and we set another time up. I was in agony waiting (it was at 2:00). Could barely make my feet/legs move to get there, but S had dropped by to talk and walked me most of the way there, and gave me a pat before I went to that office. This second talk went well. Mr. B sat next to me, described some reengineering work he wants to do, then expressed frustration (personal type) and I sympathized with him. All of it was genuine too. Two things stick out in my mind: one, that he was genuinely upset, very similar to how I was prior to taking a month off; and two, that he told me that he took last week off to relax because he does not make good decisions when he's stressed (with a significant glance at me). I'm not sure if he's referring to M or to me or both, but I appreciate what he said.

It was an exercise in all I had read in the last few days about controlling feelings/reactions. I did what Eric advised me to do. One was the deep breathing, the second was to remember his advice about fighting (arguing). And the result was excellent--Mr. B and I actually talked. And I didn't feel bad afterwards for the first time in three years (no exaggeration).

My friends at the office were terrific. Poor Pauly, I must have driven him crazy. Was in his office for quite some time this a.m., and he patiently listened and helped. S was there for most of it too, patted my knee (isn't that sweet?, really it's amazing how good a gesture like that feels) and listened too. And Issy came by to see how I was, bless her heart. After the 2:00 meeting, the guys came in to see how it went. Pauly beamed and said 'you're back' and gave me a big hug. S gave me another pat.

I love these guys, and you unseen folks too, for all of your support, friendship and love.

I know it isn't over. Stress being what it is, the whole thing could change in an instant. But what we do have is a good beginning.

M said that even if he gets a job offer while he's on vacation (now--he took 10 weeks off), he'd go into work, hire me, and then go on vacation again.

The goodness, kindness and love in these people is humbling and so nourishing. I cherish each and every one of them and you too--particularly Raven, Eric, Tshsmom, Steph, Zombieslayer, Adrian, Kris and ALL of you--if I typed each name I'd have to be much more awake than I am right now.

Here's hoping that things stay on an even keel for the next few months.

Sending you all the biggest thank-you hug you've ever had, Bridg

8 Comments:

  • At 6/14/2005 05:08:00 PM, Blogger tshsmom said…

    Excellent!!
    Remember; we have to have bad days so we can recognize good days.

     
  • At 6/14/2005 06:46:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Thanks tshsmom! Someone owes me a few!

    ha ha ha just kidding

    Bridg

     
  • At 6/14/2005 09:07:00 PM, Blogger Wandering Coyote said…

    I'm glad it went well.

    I hear the weather was supposed to break there today.

     
  • At 6/14/2005 11:05:00 PM, Blogger .: raven :. said…

    i'm so relieved girl ... i really really am.

    so happy for you.

    just remember that you can talk to him now ... practice the things you did today .. you can remain calm and it will be something you can get through.

     
  • At 6/15/2005 04:06:00 AM, Blogger nutty said…

    I don't know why but I just felt like coming by and giving hugs *hugs* Feeling silly sentimental.

     
  • At 6/15/2005 01:04:00 PM, Blogger Kris said…

    Wow - that is fantastic!!! Good for you.

     
  • At 6/15/2005 06:39:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    Hi and big giant to each of you, WC, Raven, Undies and Kris!

    I'm amazed that things went OK so far. I could barely walk (no kidding) around his office on the first day. Have not seen much of him and don't have much to do yet. There is a work allocation thing tomorrow am (watch me oversleep!).

    It's kind of like I'm not there. He took me off of all of the distribution lists for the many projects I was on (and since one of them is going to blow up BIG time politically, that's good). So it's weird. Pauly, Issy and S make a point of visiting me, full of jokes, humor, etc. at least three times a day. I absolutely adore those guys and there isn't much I wouldn't do for them. Both Pauly and Issy gave me hugs, S just kept giving me pats, which is wonderful.

    And you guys...MWAH!

    Of course, all this could be turned on its head any day. But I'm behaving. It isn't as hard as I thought it'd be (yet).

    And yes, WC, it poured rain. Woke me up at 4:30 am, and I've never seen it rain like it did today. It's a lot cooler.

    Hugs, Bridg

     
  • At 6/15/2005 06:39:00 PM, Blogger Bridget Jones said…

    errrr...that post was supposed to start with big giant HUGS to each of you!

     

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