Ravings and Rantings

Welcome to my cloud! It's got a nice silver lining somewhere.....Some ranting, some raving--mostly positive stuff,lots of jokes (I can't stay serious). Nothing going on here that a pina colada or mohito can't fix.

Sunday, February 27, 2005

Unless It Was Champagne With You

Unless It Was Champagne With You
That's from the second song I'm bonkers about (Last Night of the World Bruce Coburn).

My bud Jery dragged me out to a music thing (I am not nuts about the word 'concert') at the Black Sheep Inn in Wakefield...it was a great time! Two Irishers who DIDN'T play Celtic junk but were absolutely fabulous (Andy White and Steve Fearing). Ambience teriffic, music tops, company stellar. WOW. OK OK I admit the error of my fargin ways, I'll get out more. Or at least not stay in as much.

It was funny, the music they played was all 'talking' about Jery's life right now. Know the Roberta Flack song 'Killing me softly" and what that was about? It was that kind of thing. True Zen. He'd had a great weekend skiing too. It does the heart good to see him blossom like this. There was a sign over the door that said "Be Nice or Leave". I would LOVE a copy of that sign. GREAT slogan for work.

Got all the weekend stuff, or most of it, done between 8:00 and 1:55. Not bad. Had to get something special for someone who did the sweetest thing: the guy in the parking lot hut (he who waited 3 hours for yours truly, the ingrate). Got a neat thermos (the silver bullet one), h0t chocolate, those things that warm your feet and toes, and a set of special coffees and a neat cloth bag to put it all in. That kind of kindness deserves recognition in my book.

Felt extremely fat. Am definitely into fixing this, not for men but for me. Can you believe it, I had a dream last night that I had looooong ripply hair, and for some idiot reason, was co-starring with Johnny Depp in a play. JD was pissed at me because I tried to dye my own hair and some of it went white, some red, some blonde--it was a royal mess. I could not get anyone to fix it and was going to have to play with it like that when I woke up. Funny, I am thinking of letting my hair go white again. It's pure white, almost silver with no brown/black at all. Will look like hell until I"m skinny again, so it's a bit in the future but not much. I'm getting sick of what the dye does to it (thins it). And can't be bothered much longer with it either.

Getting back to the dream, was that a rejection thing or what???And speaking of rejection, folks, I can't count the number of times this week and weekend, mostly at night when my energy's at its lowest ebb, when I've started thinking lovingly about M. Despite all the rattle and hum. Then I remember his comment about Miss Universe (from the sounds of it) who wanted to have his baby, and my stomach tightens around what feels like cinderblock. So far that is doing the trick (keeping me from going head over heels about this man again). There are many qualities I admire about him but heaven help whoever loves him (me and a host of others). Now I am keeping it invisible and work focussed. Can't TELL you how much better it all is under this regime--the word 'infinitely' comes to mind.

Am I hiding from my own feelings or am I balancing them with facts that I've come across? Both. We all have ugly sides, the issue is whether or not those we love can cope with them.Hey let's not get into this again.Don't sweat it, I'm cool. Love the world, love the sun...not sure what my life's about unless it's getting over the pounds I've packed on. Well if J could get better, so can I.

That's all the news that's fit to print.

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